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Anti-feminists have resorted to review-bombing its Rotten Tomatoes audience score. I'm really just advocating the texture more than anything -- which, upon rereading this sentence, is somehow even more gross. Letsgasm Be mindful of which pudding you eat, however. After thorough consideration, weighing all pros and cons, I have to conclude that traditional, you-and-your-dirty-kielbasa-claw masturbation is still the best form. Your hand is one thing in a world of many things. If you're not picking up what I'm putting down yet, allow me to elucidate.

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Maybe you have a slice of ham. Many people claim the Fleshlight is even better than the real thing, at which point we're left to consider whether by "real thing" they mean their hand -- which of course they don't mean -- or an actual human vagina -- which, sadly, they do mean. It's not really in the ballpark, and sure, some snotty people who think they're better than you will make fun of it. Back in the day, you wouldn't dare touch your precious genitals with your sinister devil's paw. As many fellows will tell you, about a year or two after you've mastered the hand technique, your mind starts wandering. Maybe your beanbag chair sprung a leak and has an appropriately-sized orifice barfing beans in your room.

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So in a way, technology has indeed changed the way you jerk off -- and maybe even made it feel better, or at least different. Masturbating with your hand affords you that flesh-to-flesh connection. How can I rub my chub in a way that is more exotic and satisfying than using my hand, but will not leave a slime trail of salmonella bacteria on my sack. Artificial intelligence has been the bogeyman of science fiction since before it even existed for real. For you ladies, try to imagine something you really enjoy the feel of, repeatedly and rhythmically working your lady flower.

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Description: Have our advances in texturized rubbers improved our alone time. Letsgasm Be mindful of which pudding you eat, however. And you know after the preliminary trials, the whole project is going to be set back when one goes haywire and yanks some volunteer's dick off with such force that it gets javelined across a room and embedded in a brick wall. This is Masturbation Cream. Has Started Doing On Its Own Artificial intelligence has been the bogeyman of science fiction since before it even existed for real. You'll probably need to balance it between your thighs a little, or wedge it slightly between yourself and a pillow. Use My Facebook Avatar. As it happens, I have tried this old chestnut myself once or twice, but for science, I did it again. Connect to your existing Cracked account if you have one or create a new Cracked username.
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